Unlike many glossaries or lexicons, the definitions given here are not monocular, they have not been drawn together and written as a single source presenting The Truth. These are generally separate definitions drawn from a number of sources. That means that as you look through here, you may notice definitions that may conflict with one another, or what you have been taught elsewhere. As virtually nearly everything in here is a paraphrase, or a direct quotation of some other stated source, this means that if you disagree with what a particular source has to say about something, there’s not much I can do about it. My opinions will be noted in italics (if you disagree with those, I’ll be happy to talk about them with you).
I have chosen this technique because I do not pretend to be an expert in this field. For the most part, I am simply a conduit for information. When a term has arisen, I have started researching it by examine what the Oxford English Dictionary (2d Ed.) as a baseline. That means that if you see material that is neither in quotations, with a clear citation, or set off in italics, it is either a quotation or a paraphrase of material in the OED2. This does not mean that I think the OED is the best source available - it has a number of flaws. It is, however, a generally accepted source for quality definitions.Material that has been set off in italics are either titles or works, special words, or my own opinions.
Do you just really enjoy upsetting your rp partners? Dead set on driving them away? Can’t wait to make them crack?
LOOK NO FURTHER. Here is Willow’s quick and trusty guide to ruin your roleplay and ensure they’re never going to RP with you again! SEE BELOW.
1. Write their dialogue for them.
- Are you just sick and tired of waiting for the conversation to move along? Do you know just the thing to advance the plot? Then make their character your mouthpiece! Nothing speeds up a plot faster than skipping all the development of an intense conversation by writing their speech for them!
- Bonus points: If you don’t feel like writing the dialogue yourself, leave a blank space and tell your partner to write in the appropriate dialogue - composed by you, of course.
2. Go back and rewrite sections of plot.
- Don’t like the way things are going right now? Well, forget how characters have their own lives! Go back and rewrite things! Change dialogue! Bonus points if you forget to mention it to your partner first.
3. Introduce new characters with in-depth relationships to your partner’s character - whether they like it or not.
- You have just created the most fantastically aggravating character with a hardcore crush - and the best part is, your partner’s character has a crush on them too, and the new character knows it! What’s that? Your partner’s character (let’s call them PC from now on) is in a committed, happy relationship? EVEN BETTER.
4. Always, ALWAYS make them write the starting post.
- Even if it’s just going to be their character sitting there and doing nothing, because let’s face it, you knew this rp was going to start with your character initiating the conversation / event, but heck, give them some scribbling time.
5. Quantity vs. Quality
- Always complain that your partner’s writing didn’t give you enough to work with, but be sure to only post a couple of vague sentences yourself.
- If they write more than two paragraphs, tell them you’re not here to write a novel.
- Be sure to write long walls of text about the setting in minor areas - especially as your characters are leaving it.
6. Does your partner have a busy schedule? Are they slow typers? FANTASTIC. EXPLOIT THIS.
- When they have a break and time to RP, be sure to post right as their break ends. Complain about how they took too long to respond when they get back and you’re losing interest.
- Alternatively, be sure to tell them on a regular basis that it’s okay if they type slow, baby steps are great.
- Repeatedly disappear for days at a time and complain about the RP is going slow when you get back.
7. Do you hate spontaneous, sudden plot twists? GOOD.
- Plan out everything - and I mean everything. Is your character eating a sandwich? How many pickles are on it? Remember every single detail is vital to make sure the rp ends with your characters getting together. No matter how much they clash.
- Be sure to have your partner write all the details - after all, it’s all planned out, and you don’t have time for this, right?
8. Has your PC’s come to expect the love and support they really need from your character?
- RUIN IT. Casually slip in that your character is a psychopathic maniac who’s been on meds to keep himself together, but he recently ran out of his happy pills and just wants to make sure everyone as miserable as he is.
- Bonus: Complain about how PC’s is being unreasonable and selfish and that P is self-projecting if their character tries to back out of the relationship.
- Be sure to constantly draw pictures of PC’s and yours! Bonus for drawing them doing things your PC loathes, such as on a cruise or watching a sappy romance movie.
- Write aggressive posts on your blog about how you’re so excited on how cute your characters are together - OTP IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS, OKAY.
- Continuously ship them, even while the relationship crumbles before your eyes due to your character’s inability to coexist.
So, there you have it! A complete, quick guide to ruining all of your rps. I hope this helps someone! Reblog if you found this useful <3
BONUS: Blame your partner when the roleplay doesn’t work out.
—CS Lewis (via writingbox)